When clients are ‘in the swirl’ and depleted, how do we reconnect optimism and purpose to reignite the spark of bigger vision?

Coaching Optimism & Purpose: 3 Profound Questions to Fuel Energy for a Better Future 🌱

by Joshua Freedman, MCC

Even people with a compelling sense of purpose have days where we flag. Especially in a time when the world seems extra chaotic, it’s hard to keep a clear vision and maintain the energy to walk toward it. Let’s call that ‘being in the swirl.’

As coaches, we walk with our clients toward their goals. While we can help clients with practical or short-term goals, the most powerful coaching occurs when the goals are of deep and long-term importance. In the swirl, however, clients are likely to:

• Focus on short-term aspirations because the long-term feels too hard
• Self-limit or edit themselves because they doubt they can move forward
• Circle around despair or hopelessness because it seems impossible to find a path
• Withdraw or disconnect because these difficult feelings often trigger patterns of isolation

So in the swirl, even when we use the super-effective 3-D contracting process, it’s unlikely a client can connect with their own bigger vision.

How Optimism Helps Purpose

Remember that in the Six Seconds’ Model, optimism isn’t ‘just being positive.’ We can be realistic and confront the issues AND create new solutions. That kind of optimism is hard work, so we call the emotional intelligence competency Exercise Optimism.

Building from Martin Seligman’s work on learned optimism, we use three dimensions, or Three Bridges to optimism:

1. Time. While it might not be totally different, tomorrow will be a little different. This perspective helps us see ourselves growing and changing.

2. Isolation. While some aspects of life are problematic or even horrible, there are other parts. This helps us see potential pathways.

3.Effort. While we can’t fix or change everything, we also have not tried everything (yet). This can help us find energy to try new options.

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Three Profound Questions to Exercise Optimism on Purpose

When a client is (or we are) in the swirl, here are three questions to explore:

Whether you’re a professional coach, or contemplating earning certification as a professional emotional intelligence coach*, or you’re someone who uses coaching techniques to support others: of course these questions apply to us first.

* Did you know? In addition to top-level accreditation from the International Coaching Federation, the EQ Coach Certification is one of a handful of coaching certifications in North America that also provides master’s level credit? You’ll earn almost ⅓ of your MBA or MA in this program.

One of my foundational beliefs is that all change starts on the inside. As coaches, leaders, changemakers… if we want to bring more optimism and purpose to the world, it’s our opportunity exercise these essential tools ourselves. Remember:

Time: What’s the future you’re walking toward?

Isolation: What’s the small practice for today?

Effort: You’re adding your energy to the world – to what do you want to give?

How does this land for you as a coach? Please share a comment below!

And, if you have questions you’d like me to explore in a future 🌱 EQ Coaching newsletter and/or video, please post in the comments, or feel free to reach out to me via our contact form.

… and don’t forget to Click here to subscribe to the EQ Coach Newsletter.

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